In this episode, Dr. Alex Golden shares strategies for overcoming the fear of the unknown by addressing both the mental and emotional aspects. She explains how engaging the body through movement can help release fear and discusses practical ways to create safety nets for navigating uncertainty.
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Transcript:
Dr. Alex Golden:
Hello, hello party people. Welcome to the becoming zesty podcast. So glad that you are joining me here. I’m Dr Alex, and thank you for coming on today, we’re going to talk about a strategy for dealing with the fear of the unknown, and let’s just pull apart and parse out exactly what we’re dealing with here and what we need to do about it, because a lot of us are dealing with it currently, and there’s a lot of changes going on on the planet. There’s a lot of unknowns happening right now, and the fear really is real for so many of us, and the insecurity and kind of like the threats going on, especially when there’s financial changes going on on the planet. Obviously, most of us feel like that’s pretty valid, and we we react accordingly. And so we have also, before I get into this strategy, a whole bunch of events coming up for y’all and also even online, ongoing, monthly meetups, because we know that there’s a lot going on right now, and leaders need to hang out with other leaders, and they need to have the support and the understanding of people who are in the thick of it, with them and dealing with all of these unknowns, because, of course, the leadership of the planet generally is living and is dealing with the known way more than the people following as is appropriate. There’s nothing wrong with that. And so having more resources for you when you know that you are leading people and moving them to action is super duper important. So check out the show notes. We have an event in Dallas coming up March, 8 and ninth, that if you are anywhere in the area or are available to fly in, it is going to be a whole bunch of resources, like the stuff that I’m going to share with you today. And so we want to get the word out as much as possible, because, like I said, the leadership needs the goodies for themselves, and then they can go teach other people, which is, of course, what we want. We want to extend that ripple effect and make it a win, win, win for the world at large and for everybody on this planet. So with that being said, what is this strategy of fear the unknown? What most people try to do for the fear of the unknown is they are accurately perceiving that their mental body is having question marks about what’s going to happen. And so often we are actually trying to address a fear of the unknown by trying to land on some sort of mental concept or construct that will make us feel better. One of the favorite things to do when people are feeling like in a happy place emotionally with that is that when they feel the fear of that known come up, they just try to say things like, well, you know, I’m a manifester, or I’m a creator. I’m powerful, and so that’s what I’m going to do. And they keep it pushing and then when it’s bad, so often it’s just like, oh gosh, okay. I don’t know if I can do this. I don’t know what’s going to happen. I don’t know if I can. Do it. And so often people collapse the unknown by predicting that it’s going to be a bad outcome that they know instead. So just to break that down, that is basically a human brain would rather land on. You’re just not going to have the thing you want with certainty, as opposed to even possibly getting the thing you want. But it is uncertain up to a certain point. So it’s an interesting thing to watch out for, because if we don’t watch out for that kind of thing happening in our brain, we will so often close the door on what we say that we want, and it doesn’t totally or doesn’t at all align or match up with the results that we say that we want. But that’s why trying to deal with this problem from a mental body strategy, I would put to you, is kind of a rough way to go about it, because all of these things where we are that we are discussing here, there’s limitations. There’s just not a way to guarantee for the unknown what you’re going to get. And that’s the whole point, right? Some things just don’t necessarily have an answer of what’s going to happen or a guarantee of how it will occur. So therefore, it’s not that the mental body endeavors or the attempts that we make to make sense of the unknowns are bad. In fact, if those things work and you get an answer and you have one to have, that’s awesome. Oftentimes, that’s great. When we have the question, we answer our own question, and we come to this kind of thing. So that’s awesome. The problem is, when we don’t have a satisfactory enough question, where else do we go? And the point of this episode is to say, I believe where we go is the emotional body, Fear is just the emotion attached to it’s the response of the unknown and the lack of being able to answer that. So once you’ve engaged in the mental body, enough like that, so often, you will start to feel worse and worse because there isn’t an answer to what you’re wondering, there isn’t a guarantee, and there’s no one to necessarily reassure you enough that satisfy satisfies the mental body, and that is why the compass, then emotional compass, is getting louder and louder and louder As you try to do that. Now, one could argue that, because it feels bad that that’s the wrong thing, but I’d actually argue the opposite, that when you take your emotional compass out for a spin like that, and then you get information back, that is an important step to using and learning to reactivate the compass. Most of us have not had free rain over sharing or feeling or processing our emotions, so it takes us a second to get there. But there’s nothing wrong with engaging in the mental body in a way where we say, hold on. This is not helping. This is actually making things worse and then allowing that to be our introduction and on our AHA to say if the problem is actually in the emotional body, instead of trying to answer this mentally and have some sort of aha there that will make my emotional body feel better, let me do something to help my emotional body feel the strain and the stress of that fear less. How do I actually alleviate some of that? That is where you can make the choice. And it sounds crazy, when, from the point of being an over thinker, I can honestly say I’d be like, well, that doesn’t make sense. Like, why would actually helping my emotional body work through the fear and release it, then go back and help my mind. But that is exactly what happens when you do it. Is that fear, generally, is an activating emotion, but not for everybody. So some people, it moves you to action. You just can’t sit still. You got to finish that project, you got to go do laundry, you got to finish dinner, you got to go study for something else, right? It’s activating. And for some people, it’s just more the freeze, like, it’s just like, oh gosh, I guess I just won’t do anything at all. I don’t even know what to do. And that is where, when we help and approach ourselves from an emotional standpoint, being like, if I’m activated, what would be the way that would feel good to move my body, to move the fear through it and all the way out? Right? It might be throw and throw pillows against your bed. It might be ripping. Paper. It might be smashing Play Doh. It might be screaming into a pillow or a towel. It might be working out or stomping around the block or the house or in your backyard, any and all of those can feel really, really good to move and discharge the activated energy of fear. And so often when I’ve done that, and the people that I’ve worked with have done that, that is where their mental body often says who, without the strain of my emotional body just ramping up that fear and the energy of that, it is so much more easy to just weather the fact that, no, I don’t have the answers, and yes, I can be okay with that. But again, if you’ve never taken that for a spin and actually live that, that’s like listening to someone describe what it’s like to go swimming, you can hear the mechanics of getting in the water and moving your arms and legs a certain way, but you don’t know what that’s like. And so if that’s the case, that’s where try it out. See what happens. What about what happens when you move your body and allow yourself to discharge that fearful energy, and then when people are in more of that freeze, what would feel good for the more deactivated? Is it just resting. Is it laying in bed and crying a little bit and maybe doing some parasympathetic exercises? Is it doing some breath work or somatic as long as it doesn’t feel like you’re like, just trying to fix something about yourself that’s wrong? Is it talking with a friend? Is it journaling in bed? Is it stretching your body or doing yoga, some sort of slow, slow, gentle movement, and maybe crying a little bit while you’re moving? You know, any and all of those can feel so good to discharge that extra energy and when it locks us up, so it feels so much better, because we are in a state of being kind of frozen in space and time. And as we release the tension, and we release that energy from the emotional body, and therefore from the physical body, we then can free ourselves up, it feels like, whoa. I can think a little bit more clearly now. I can be more logical and come up with a plan for myself, and that is where I will shamelessly plug in the reminder to create safety nets for yourself when you feel good, if you are like me and you are prone to being like I’m not totally sure what to do when I feel super duper bad, like you stop being as reasonable, maybe more than other people. You feel that’s okay, just come up with a plan. Where are you gonna go? Where are you gonna look, jotting things down while you’re in a more resourceful state. Therefore, when you feel the fear either activate you in a very robust way or deactivate you on a way that’s like, whoa. This is really derailing me. Then we can make sure that we know exactly where to look, where the thinking has already been done, and there’s nothing else that we have to do other than look at that piece of paper or that note or whatever that you have on your phone, and just follow it exactly. This is what I plan for me now and then, taking the feedback. If something works for you, awesome. Jot that down in the plan. And if it doesn’t, then you have another data point. This didn’t work in this scenario. Now it may not work in any scenario, and you’ll find that out, but more than likely, that’s where people fill out their own toolkit. Most things work for a scenario, and that’s why, the more broader you have of resourcing to support yourself, then nothing can happen in life where you feel like, gosh, I left myself hanging. I don’t take care of what I mean. You know, none of those thoughts that decrease our self worth can follow because we have practically done that work. Our brain knows it, and it cannot lie to us and our mental Gremlins about that. So I really hope this has cleared up a lot about fear the unknown and how to deal with it, and has given you a lot of ideas for moving it and processing it however it hits you at any given time, matching it up to what you need, and making sure to remind yourself that you’re doing this because you love you, Because you deserve to be treated well, because you’re worthy of having a plan, and just know that we all, as SD think that you are worthy of all that too, and we are rooting for you all so much. Check out the show notes and sign up for the events coming up. We’ll see you there, and we’ll see you on the online stuff. See you soon. Bye.